Archive for the ‘Dating Women’ Category
Of the 131 quarterly infections in April to June, 65 were MSM infections and at least some of the 37 infections of so-far undetermined source were expected to fall into the same category, he said. The figure is both the highest quarterly number and ratio of MSM infections on record.
By contrast, Wong said, the trend for heterosexual infections had remained stable in recent years. “The MSM epidemic is a big challenge in HIV prevention and control,” he said, with rates many times higher than other at-risk groups.
Most infections in the MSM community result from unprotected sex. “I am not sure why but maybe some members in the (MSM) community are just ambivalent. They don’t have enough awareness or concern about the risk of infection, or they just ignore the issue,” said Wong.
In contrast to Grindr’s rapid popularity, the Department of Health’s mobile app targeting MSM has picked up few followers so far, Wong admitted.
The most effective way to tackle the epidemic, however, he said, was through safe sex education and regular HIV testing – something currently done by around 40 percent of Hong Kong’s MSM population.
“If safe sex can be taught at an early age, it is useful for future protection,” Wong said. “Interestingly, from the surveys we have done, we found that condom use when an MSM first has sex is correlated with consistent condom use in future.
“We don’t know why but this finding is quite consistent. So it would be useful if they could be taught to use condom when they have sex when they are still quite young.”
Paul Ramscar, a Hong Kong businessman and gay rights advocate who is launching a Pink Dollar smart phone app to promote gay-friendly bars, shops, nightclubs and restaurants, said it would be wrong to single out Grindr for blame in the rise in HIV cases.
“It’s a tragedy when this happens to someone but ultimately the buck stops with the individual. They need to be looking after their own health,” he said. “If they want to take the risks, if they want to play what is effectively Russian Roulette by not using a condom, then maybe there are going to be consequences.”
Dating Women: Is revenge on an ex ever justified?
Dating Women is an occasional relationship column that appears in Health.
Q Is vengeance ever a good idea? I’m feeling particularly bitter and resentful about a guy who was falling all over me, in love with me one week and then back with his ex the next, claiming he still had feelings for her that he had to figure out. I’m not talking about the kind of revenge that involves bodily harm or damage to any of his possessions, just something that would make me feel better about how badly this guy treated me, and make him feel as bad as he made me feel. Any ideas?
A You can’t fight fire with fire. It just results in a bigger fire. And, honestly, he hasn’t done anything that many of us haven’t done before — that is, be confused about our feelings/make a mistake/get back together with an ex.
The best revenge you can have is to find another better relationship and/or be happy and enjoy life. If you can’t go directly to happy, do something that will help satisfy your revenge urge without starting an inferno. Write him a nasty letter but don’t send it, for example. Anything that helps you satisfy your desire for payback but won’t get you arrested.
Q My girlfriend of six months recently sat me down for what was essentially an “I need space” conversation. I immediately assumed that this was simply a disguised, gentle way of giving me the boot, but I was confused because I really felt like things had been chugging along quite nicely. When I told her this, she completely agreed and said that’s the reason she needs some breathing room. She went on to explain that most of her past relationships failed because she felt she invested too much of herself in trying to making them work and lost her identity in the process. She’d eventually resent this and end things. She said that because she feels we have something special, she wants to make sure she doesn’t repeat this pattern and feels that establishing more space for herself within our relationship will ultimately be better for it. What do you think?
— Space Issues
A I do think space can be good for a relationship. But in order for the concept of “needing space” to be good for a relationship, you both have to be actively involved in how it goes down. What kind of space does she need? Also, set a time limit on your little “space” experiment.